A Work in Progress: Day 150

For the longest four months into my college life, have I attempted to refrain from answering the people who have been pushing me to reveal why I shifted courses when I was almost there.

I wasn’t really sure myself if it was the shame of having to go through another two to three years of Pharmacy subjects before graduating, or was it the pressure of focusing on my current track? Probably because early on I have anticipated the numerous questions that had crept my mind since November.

On the other hand, albeit the expectations of most people, I have been doing very well in the College of Pharmacy – I have a new refuge in the seclusions of the St. Theresa’s Building; old friends are still with me, but now with the addition of great people, in all-white uniforms; a more organized schedule which lets me move freely in between subjects; a slowly rebuilding self – esteem which I thought was lost, but most especially, a provision and a renewed promise from God that this is going to be the best move forward.

Gone were the days when I had to succumb to the heavy feelings I had back at the Cardinal Santos Building (my former department was situated in the eerie corner of its Second Floor). I no longer have to brush shoulders with the professors whose preconceptions about me cannot be changed by my simple acts of progress – praises you but talks about you differently when you’re away.

I no longer have to deal with its tyrant, and her dealings. For a very long time, I have told my juniors how she deals with concern and care, however deep inside I have feelings of disappointment. But alas, they are now gone, and I wouldn’t be dealing with them for a long time.

For the longest four months in my college life, I have found peace and happiness to where I am now. Probably I wouldn’t mind too much answering questions why I left. Why I didn’t just finish Chemistry. Why I ‘wasted’ three years for nothing (this not true, FYI. Pharmacy is STILL Chemistry). I am a work in progress: His work, in progress. He still has a lot in store for me, all because I tried to do things on my own. But He steers for me now.

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Emerging SUPREME

*I wrote this in the verge of cramming my Organization’s Operational Plan defense for tomorrow, so please bear your kuya’s/Sir’s grammar. My apologies also, for not being able to attend your Welcoming Rites yesterday morning, and your Graduation this afternoon. I feel very bad for not being able to do so, and because of that, I felt the urge to tell you how it’s been for me, having handled you from your First Day in Summer Training.

Being a Tactical Officer back at CMSHS has been one of the best things that I enjoyed once I graduated High School,( wellbesides from going back to school to teach 4th Year Chemistry from time to time.) Why? Because I always get to impart the stuff that I learned the hard way – the things that I had to undergo in order to be resilient, brave, and competent so I can be the best when the going gets tough.

Another thing, is because its fun to see new faces who want to be catalysts. Catalysts of Change in their own little ways. People who want to stand out, take the wheel and walk the path that others fear to tread. People who smile amidst difficulties and obstacles. People who unite in the most stressing situations. People who would never succumb to defeat, nor tofailure. These are the people I look forward to everytime I pass that turn as I walk towards the basketball court every MWF.

Some of you have been my mentees the previous year, and it was a relief for me to see familiar faces in the class. Sure, the signs of me doing this for three years in a row was slowly sinking in at that moment, but I shrugged it off and tried to show no particular preference in the training grounds. You were all equal, and it had to be that way. Of course, the young ones were no excuse to my strict way of commanding the drills, and management of behaviour. But remembing a quote which goes “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” I was sure that I wouldn’t let them skip my satire and my spontaneous stories. I was fun that way. And I hoped you were okay with how I dealt with stuff.

I tried to incorporate how things should actually be when you’re an Officer, and how things should be inside class. These are things you don’t leave behind once you get your ranks and positions. These are the things you have to carry out as young leaders who came into training, hoping to develop these values out of the weeks that you have trained.

You will continuously learn the drills, the marching, the sword-bearing, and the rifle drills, but the core values that you have learned will ALSO keep you on your post, and will earn you the respect from your subordinates. I have to be honest, it was a hard time foreseeing how it will turn out for your Class, as no one is standing out (for me, my apologies guys.).
It might be too early for me, and the others to think of this. But right now, I pose a big challenge for you guys:
I see that you have coined “Supremo” as your Class name. Superior among others. In character, performance, and in achievement. You have posed a challenge by choosing this name, for you shall be known as members of Class Supremo. And because of this, I challenge you to stand by this name, and live it out as you go through your ten months as Class Supremo for School year 2013 – 2014. You shall be known for this name, and it is your responsibility to act it out.

Young Leaders of Class Supremo, stand tall! For today, you shall no longer be Cadet/Cadette Trainees. You are now Officers of the Corps of Cadets of the City of Mandaluyong Science High School. Never forget what you have learned. Prove our worries and fears wrong.
For you all shall ( and definitely will) emerge Supreme.

Cdt. Maj. Jimenez, J.M.
Class Matalikha of 2010

Keep Aiming

Just this morning, I was faced yet again by another setback while preparing for our Organization’s Operational Plan – the Organization’s Plan of Activities for the whole school year.  Our Committee Directors, mostly Senior Chemistry Students, are busy with their Summer Practicum, and the other officers are busy with their Summer Class (like me, for instance).

And what’s worse in this situation, is that we have barely 6 days to finish the Operational Plan, before we defend our proposed activities to the Student Affairs Office.

 

It’s been very stressful for me, and being the President, I did not want to take on all the responsibilities for them, in order to finish this task. And right now, I feel utterly depressed with how things are going. I even succumbed to writing my own resignation letter, even before I start my work with the Society, and settle as the Organization’s Society Representative to our National Organization – the Philippine Association of Chemistry Students.

And as I finished posting my rather long (and depressing) announcement to get this Operational Plan done (and so I can start drafting my Resignation Letter), a friend of mine shared this photo on Facebook:

 

A thought came into me, and I began praying. Maybe this is just part of the struggles I have to face for now. Maybe I still have a lot to prove, and I have to prove my unbelievers wrong. I closed my browser, and began drafting portions of the OP.

I just got to keep aiming, and aim higher than before.