Say You Love Me

For convincing myself has been harder lately,
Without you near,
Distant from me lately
I need reassurance
To get myself by.

For the shadows of the past linger on,
While you’re away
I miss your embrace
The confidence it gives
To risk another try.



May mga pagkakataon talagang iba kapag may nakakaramay ka sa ‘hirap at ginhawa’ – mga kaibigang hindi ka iiwanan kapag gipitan na, at alam mong nandiyan lang sila palagi para sayo. Hindi ba’t ang saya kapag ganun ang samahan? Ohana nga, sabi sa pelikulang ‘Lilo and Stitch’, “Ohana means family. And family means no one gets left behind.”

Siyempre, sa kahit anong samahanag matatag, hindi nawawala ang mga magkakaibigang todo effort din naman sa pagtupad sa ginagampanan nilang role bilang ‘friend’. At kung minsan nga, iniisip kong overqualified ako, sa mga iilang pagkakataon na ipinapakita ko ang suporta ko sa iba.

Pero hindi naiiwasan na dumating ang panahon na mapapaisip ka rin talaga kung nagiging ‘worth it’ pa ang mga ginagawa mo for the sake of friendship. For instance, no matter how late na si person/friend kapag may gagawin kayo, at alam mong may iba ka pa ding gagawin, iisipin mo pa rin na hintayin siyang dumating, bago ka tumuloy. Kung yung maiwanan nga lang siya sa likod kapag nagmamadali kayong maglakad, at maraming tao sa daan, tumitigil ka pa rin para hintayin siya, hindi ba?

Siguro nga, kaya naman ganun na lang ang naging ideyalismo ng nanay ko pagdating sa ganitong bagay – ang maging ‘single bodied’ ka, nang hindi mo kakailanganin na umasa sa iba, sa mga bagay na ikaw lang mag-isa pero kayang kayang mo naman. Hindi man ito dahilan dahil sa gusto mong mapag-isa at wala kang tiwala sa mga tao sa paligid mo, ngunit isa na rin itong paraan upang maiwasan mong sumama ang loob mo sa ibang tao dahil hindi nila nagawa ang mga bagay na ikaw, nagagawa mo sa kanila.

Ikaw ba, soloista ka rin?

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Guy in Waiting

It was a rainy Tuesday, today. Somehow, He heard someone’s prayers of cooling down Manila earlier. I barely had sleep today, since it took me awhile to finish my reviews on Sociology and Anthropology. It was a rather tough exam, but my love for the Social Sciences made up for it. It was 8:00 A.M, when I texted you, if wanted to meet up for breakfast. You happily agreed. Before I left, I found out that  the fast checking of papers revealed how my all nighter was a success.   It made me more ecstatic to meet you :) Days before that special day, amidst the stresses of school, we catch up on one another.

But there were a few glitches, when you called me. You were going to be away for a two nights, and it took you awhile to pack up your stuff. You ask me if it was okay with you, running a little late than scheduled, as I tell you ‘Its okay. Madalas naman ako nalalate kapag nagkikita tayo.’ And, I sat down, wrote a few pages while waiting you come.

You came through the door, with a bag on your shoulders, and a plastic bag with your clothes. I gave you your favorite cinnamon roll :) And we ate, and chat a little. I was thinking a lot, and you did too. The stresses of this last two weeks of school, and your defense is getting on to you. I can’t do anything but be a moral supporter, nothing more.

How I can’t wait for Summer! I can’t wait to see you smiling again, without so much worries. Without the sleepless nights, even for two months.. like how I can hold your hand, and you not being worried been seen me holding it. How I can finally be that person I have hope to be for you.

But all those would have to wait for now. For a true love always wait. :)



I took a rather blurry picture of my name’s lettering that my beloved hon wrote on the front cover of a notebook that he gave me 5 days ago. Actually, it was small notebook, one which was green in color, and had this design of a shoe print on the front, and the quotation that said:

“A Journey of a thousand miles begins with one step”

Seriously, I was so thrilled with the small gift he gave. I don’t know, but, I’m very fond of notebooks coz I like to have my random thoughts a lot on paper. And, because of the notebook’s theme, I thought of writing our best experiences together, on that small green notebook. After all, I believe we both still have a long way to go, and this journey of ours is just starting.

March 22, 2011

I can’t believe two semesters have already passed me by
Has it been that long, really? I just can’t tell.
Honestly, I looked so sickly then! And my eyebags were so big!
I had so many animosities around me.
I had a burdened heart.
And I had a shattered soul.

But now, after all those hardships, I can say I’ve done mourning over it.
Yet, I still look back and learn from my mistakes.

There were times that skinned my knees, and I kneel down seeing its scars.
I lament over it, shed tears for it, and
Then I stand up, and feel the ground underneath me.
When I scarred my knee, wasn’t it that it also felt the same?
Stomped, kicked, and driven on?
Yet it continues to serve its purpose?
That was when I realized, ‘I should serve my purpose too’.

I started out my journey, alone. But along the way, friends old and new came with me.
This time, I was sure that I would not leave out a single person behind.
Being an introvert caused me a few, you know?
From now on, I will try to refrain from being one.
Together, we faced each problem at all angles,
And as one, we turned out to be triumphant.

Before, I told myself I can handle a lot of things on my own.
But now, I am so indebted to these people who believed in me, for I also believed in them.

A year has passed, and my repressed memories of hurt are relived.
I tell myself I shall emancipate from it.
Months flew by, and here I am still.
My friends walk along with me.
I have my heart, ready to share to others.
A content soul
And He who guided me to get here.